Jaewan Park, a 39-year-old professional, is a big fan of Lee Sora’s song “Please.” He’s so fond of it that he often dreamed of someone singing it just for him. But could destiny really work in such mysterious ways? Five years ago, after much hesitation, he decided to attend a gathering hosted by a gay organization for the first time. It was there he met Jung-Han Shin, a man four years his senior. After their group dinner, they went to karaoke, and Jung-Han performed that very song beautifully. Jaewan was instantly smitten. And it seemed Jung-Han didn’t mind the attention either. Their love story began shortly thereafter.
I met the couple on the 5th at the office of Chingusai (“Between Friends”), a gay rights organization in Jongno, Seoul. Jaewan, dressed sharply in a black shirt and gray tie chosen by Jung-Han that morning, wore a constant smile. On the other hand, Jung-Han, in a refreshing sky-blue shirt, maintained a calm and composed demeanor. Jaewan, the more talkative of the two, frequently glanced at Jung-Han and held his hand during the interview. Even to an unfamiliar journalist, the reserved Jung-Han and the lively Jaewan exuded happiness and harmony.
Jung-Han affectionately calls Jaewan “Jaekyung,” a nickname Jaewan created to express a lighter, more androgynous vibe. Meanwhile, Jaewan, depending on his mood, refers to Jung-Han by various names, such as “hyung” (older brother), “unni” (older sister), “lady,” or even “you rascal.” Jaewan is responsible for most of the playful gestures and affection in their relationship, while Jung-Han, the quieter one, provides balance.
Jaewan, who also serves as the leader of Chingusai, dedicates his evenings after work to LGBTQ+ advocacy and organizing activities. Jung-Han is actively involved as well, alongside most of the group’s members, who spend their free time contributing to the cause. However, when they want private time, the couple enjoys dining out or watching movies together. Recently, with Jung-Han preparing to leave his job to open a café, they’ve been spending more time scouting locations together. Despite being notoriously bad with directions and having a routine that typically revolves around home, work, and the organization, Jaewan has managed to explore places like Samcheong-dong’s café district—all thanks to Jung-Han.
When walking together, they naturally link arms or hold hands, paying no attention to the stares of others. “You might think two men holding hands in public would draw a lot of attention, but it really doesn’t,” Jaewan says. “Nobody says anything. Occasionally, we might hear drunk people hurl insults when we pass by a dark alley, but we don’t let it bother us.” Their ability to stay comfortable in public is partly thanks to Jaewan’s personality, as he tends not to care much about others’ opinions. Jung-Han humorously describes him as having a “me, myself, and I” attitude. “He’s not one for compromise,” Jung-Han jokes. “It can be frustrating at times, but what can I do? I usually just let it go.”
Meeting Jung-Han has changed Jaewan’s outlook on life. When he was single, he often felt like he was in constant competition with heterosexual people. “I felt like I couldn’t afford to be underestimated because I’m gay,” he recalls. That mindset led him to work with extreme diligence, holding himself—and others—to rigorous standards, which made it challenging for his colleagues and juniors at work.
Looking back, Jaewan says he realized he was different from his friends even before entering elementary school. In a time when sex education was nearly nonexistent, his friends learned about sexuality from older kids or adult magazines. However, Jaewan’s feelings didn’t align with theirs, and he didn’t find that type of learning appealing. Instead, he kept his struggles to himself. Wrestling with a desire to reject his true self, he endured a difficult period. It wasn’t until adulthood, after joining the organization and talking with people like Jung-Han, that he began to understand himself better. He came to terms with why he felt the way he did and, through self-acceptance, was eventually able to come out to his friends and coworkers.
For sexual minorities, coming out is a form of personal growth and expansion. By meeting and connecting with diverse individuals, they gain a deeper understanding of others, broaden their perspective on life and humanity, and embrace the beauty of their unique identity.
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